ash (ashesof_hope) wrote,

In the Name of

Title : In the Name of
Pairing : Ryo x Uchi (Ryo-centric)
Genre : Drabble. Angst, drama
Rating : PG
Summary : Love follows him like a shadow through eternity, through lifetime and through death.
A/N : I'm feeling a little emo and since I seek solace in fic-writing, you get a pretty senseless and mangled-up drabble that tries too hard to be deep. Comments are appreciated like always.

In the Name of

True love stories don’t have an ending.


What about love stories like his? Through eternity, through different lifetimes and through death. He followed relentlessly. Following the ever-changing appearances of the one person he had eyes for and knowing that to him, he was just an insignificant face while to him, he was everything.


This lifetime, he was Uchi Hiroki and he was Nishikido Ryo, bounded by the bonds of friendship and restricted to the affections a friend would show to another friend, except that what Ryo felt was nothing like friendship. But it was better this way, because even before it began, he already knew how it would all end, thanks to the workings of fate. Even if their worlds were inversed and there was just the slightest glimmer of hope tossed to him, he already knew the ending waiting for him at the bend of the road where there was only the sharp drop of a canyon into the abyss underneath.


Life and death are only separated by one single footstep but my love stays, even if my body becomes fragments of an empty shell, crushed and broken beyond recognition.


Which was why he never told Uchi that he loved him. Because he didn’t need the person he loved mourning his death. But that wouldn’t stop Uchi from crying, from grieving, from kneeling in front of his grave countless days and countless nights until the days stretched into weeks and the weeks stretched into eternity. And from somewhere not too far away, he would watch. Knowing that Uchi would whip his head around in wild desperation whenever he got too near and so he stayed far away. Just enough distance for Uchi to be oblivious while he sat down and accompanied Uchi through his tears, watching Uchi pour the pills into his outstretched palm and looking at them with morbid fascination.


As flies to wanton boys are we to th’  Gods, they kill us for their sport.


It was okay with him if his whole life was toyed with for amusement, okay if his life was taken away at a single whim, a single desire because all he was was the butt of someone’s cruel joke, an object for ridicule and disdain. But he wouldn’t lose his faith, his belief or his love for Uchi that made him who he was despite all the different masks he wore. Deep down inside, he was the same person who was blessed with the gift of knowing that there was only one person meant for him, and the same person who was cursed with the knowledge that the person he loved would only realise the feelings that mirrored his own after his blood was spilled and his candle of life was snuffed out. It would be much easier to hate and to despair, but to do that would be to deny himself the joy, the pain and the exhilaration of falling and drowning in those ancient eyes that proved to be his downfall, time after time.    


All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes


Because love was not merely a cloak of deceit used to mask human to the cruel realities of the world. Love was not a false hope God invented to give human something to cling to. Love was the one spur he had to keep him going, and the one thing he would never feel in return.

Tags: drabble, in the name of

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